As I was quickly and easily throwing a load of clothes into the washing machine the other day, I began to reminisce about how excruciatingly difficult it was to do the very same task when I was battling postpartum depression. Every little step was torturous. Transferring clothes from the hamper to the laundry basket, carrying the basket to the basement, loading the clothes into the washing machine, pushing the buttons. All of it was hellacious. Doing the task was amazingly hard, and thinking about having to do it was just as, if not more taxing. If doing laundry was this hard imagine how difficult it was getting my kids into their car seats and going on an errand. As a result I would go several days without leaving my house. At the time I didn’t realize how dysfunctional I was. Every single daily activity was this daunting.
Being on the other side of postpartum depression and thinking back to those times has made me aware that I am truly a survivor. I made it out the other side. I have come so far from those days. Doing laundry is an easy task that I quickly squeeze in between my other important daily activities without even thinking or planning for it.
A year and a half ago I could have never imagined going to work, taking care of my family and working out six to seven days a weeks. As well as developing a hard earned love for running and racing. If you told me a year ago that today that I would be training for a half marathon; I would have never believed you.
My wish for those of you suffering with postpartum depression is that you find the other side too.