I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I am disappointed that I didn’t run a sub 4 at the Chicago marathon. I have been playing the “what ifs” ever since and it’s driving me crazy. Don’t get me wrong, I am very proud of my 21 plus minute PR, but it stings a little bit that I worked so hard towards a specific time goal and fell a bit short. So this post is a small little vent to get the what if’s out of my brain once and for all.
What if I my Garmin was set up properly and I never had to try and fix it while I was running?
What if I didn’t run so fast when my watch wasn’t working?
What if my back didn’t get effed up the Friday before the marathon?
What if I had not taken those naproxen the day of and the day before the marathon?
What if I had started in wave 2 and ran with my friend who got a sub 4?
What if I didn’t stop to give my girls hugs and kisses between mile 18 and 19?
What if I didn’t eat those bites of turkey sandwich and potato chips that I asked my husband to bring me on the course?
What if I didn’t walk through those aid stations in the last few miles of the marathon?
What if I stopped at less aid stations?
What if I strengthened my lower body with more weight training pre marathon?
This is all probably a symptom of my post-marathon depression. I’ve been feeling super blah these last few days. I’m eating more, sleeping more, super irritable and feel just plain lazy. Now that I have laid most it out here maybe I can let it go, get past it and celebrate what I did accomplish.
Have you ever been close to a goal but not close enough? How did you deal with it?